Faith vs. Being prepared

I have recently been wondering where to find the balance.... or if there even is a balance. My thinking tells me that faith is always a good thing, but maybe I sometimes get confused as to what is actually faith. You hear a lot of people talking as if something will happen, but not really worrying if it doesn't - is that faith? Or is that pretending to have faith? Is that having a little bit of faith? What kind of faith do I have? I want the kind of faith that is CERTAIN of what I do not see.

How does faith co-exist with reality? Maybe this is a silly question.... let's get back to my title, what am I thinking?

Well, I am responsible for paying the bills at the community centre at the moment and we have a lot of bills. In fact, we have more money going out each month than we have coming in (as we all know that can't carry on long term, the savings we had have almost gone). This particular job is one that has caused a lot of stress to people in the past and when I took it on I made a deal with God (if you can actually do such a thing) - it went a bit like this "OK God, I'll do the finance stuff, but, I am NOT responsible for the money coming in - that is your job, OK? I can just pay the bills that have to be paid, receive the money that comes in and document everything - You have to provide and I will NOT worry about it!"

Maybe that's easier said than done, but I've tried to keep my part and when I begin to worry then I have to remind myself that I only have to do my part. So, where is my faith? I have been doing all I can to budget well and to 'be prepared', I believe that is one way I can be a good steward. However, my biggest question is do I allow my desire to be prepared cause me to stop the house from doing things (because they would cost money that we don't have at the moment) when really I should have faith that God will provide? To what extent do we carry on as normal, with the sure conviction of faith that God will provide? Or is this mere foolishness and not accepting our responsibilities in administering well? I'm not talking about doing ridiculous things e.g going out with a credit card and buying nice new furniture saying that I have faith in God to pay the bill at the end of the month. I'm talking about little things, meat in the menu, chlorine for the pool (this is a pool used for swimming lessons for the kids and women in the community, rather than a leisure pool). Are these the kind of things we can expect God to provide for us? What constitutes our needs? When is it that I'm pulling back because I'm being wise or because I'm afraid of the next bill?

Lots and lots of questions, not sure how to answer any of them. Any suggestions?